We all fall victim to the craze
New Year...New Decade...New YOU, right?
Personally I just can't do another round
of setting an impossibly high bar with
a list of resolutions I won't even glance at by
JANUARY 31st!
Instead I'll just share what I call my
2010 Fanny Pact:
1. WORK THE POLES
You know...
all the countries between North and South
POLE!!!
That's a lot of ground to cover
195 sovereign nations to be exact
I better get to gettin'
2. FILL MY DRAWER WITH ELECTRIC TOYS
Have you discovered the wonders of a waffle iron?
Oh me...Oh my
It will change your life!
I just saw an eggbeater in this week's circular
SOMEBODY STOP ME!
3. TURN TRICKS
As the auntie to a pair of 2 year old
rambunctious wonder twins
I know they're bound to get tired of
that severed thumb thingy
This Black Magic Woman
is in need of more tricks up her sleeve...
and quick!
4. LET IT HIT THE BOTTOM
I MUST MUST MUST purge Le Closet!
Toss all the unwanteds
at the bottom of the Goodwill pile
and never look back
How else will I make room
for more yummilicious FF stunnas?
5. STEP MY TEABAGGING GAME UP
I should color outside the lines a lil'
Try some Oolong...
Darjeeling...
Ceylon...
So many varietals
So many bags to steep!
6. MORE MAC-ING
No, not of the makeup variety
but with my fine ass hunk of loving
Wielding 13 glorious inches of pleasure...
My new MacBook Pro!
7. MAKE IT CLAP
This year my Funky Fanny's vintage ensembles
will be so mouth watering...
so insane...
Forget people
The clothes themselves
will break out in applause damnit!
8. BE A BETTER CALL GIRL
Less Tweets, texts, IMs
Emails and posts...
I will reach out and touch somebody
Pick up the phone
And dare I say it?
Have an honest to God conversation
Novel idea...I know
9. SWALLOW OFTEN
Check my pride at the door
and keep it moving
No room for ego
When you have dreams to follow
10. TAKE IT ALL IN
Enormous quantities of delicious vintage
and only at the heavenly Wonderland of
Funky Fanny's of course!
New Year...New Decade...New YOU, right?
Personally I just can't do another round
of setting an impossibly high bar with
a list of resolutions I won't even glance at by
JANUARY 31st!
Instead I'll just share what I call my
2010 Fanny Pact:
1. WORK THE POLES
You know...
all the countries between North and South
POLE!!!
That's a lot of ground to cover
195 sovereign nations to be exact
I better get to gettin'
2. FILL MY DRAWER WITH ELECTRIC TOYS
Have you discovered the wonders of a waffle iron?
Oh me...Oh my
It will change your life!
I just saw an eggbeater in this week's circular
SOMEBODY STOP ME!
3. TURN TRICKS
As the auntie to a pair of 2 year old
rambunctious wonder twins
I know they're bound to get tired of
that severed thumb thingy
This Black Magic Woman
is in need of more tricks up her sleeve...
and quick!
4. LET IT HIT THE BOTTOM
I MUST MUST MUST purge Le Closet!
Toss all the unwanteds
at the bottom of the Goodwill pile
and never look back
How else will I make room
for more yummilicious FF stunnas?
5. STEP MY TEABAGGING GAME UP
I should color outside the lines a lil'
Try some Oolong...
Darjeeling...
Ceylon...
So many varietals
So many bags to steep!
6. MORE MAC-ING
No, not of the makeup variety
but with my fine ass hunk of loving
Wielding 13 glorious inches of pleasure...
My new MacBook Pro!
7. MAKE IT CLAP
This year my Funky Fanny's vintage ensembles
will be so mouth watering...
so insane...
Forget people
The clothes themselves
will break out in applause damnit!
8. BE A BETTER CALL GIRL
Less Tweets, texts, IMs
Emails and posts...
I will reach out and touch somebody
Pick up the phone
And dare I say it?
Have an honest to God conversation
Novel idea...I know
9. SWALLOW OFTEN
Check my pride at the door
and keep it moving
No room for ego
When you have dreams to follow
10. TAKE IT ALL IN
Enormous quantities of delicious vintage
and only at the heavenly Wonderland of
Funky Fanny's of course!
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